Q&A
Can We Be More Than Just Friends with Benefits?
Question:
I have been really good friends with a guy, but I don't want us to remain as only "friends with benefits." Whenever I see him flirting with other women, I get terribly upset because he acts as if there is nothing between us -- and there is. But I can't voice out my true feelings and tell him, "I don't want you to flirt with other women" because we're not having a relationship and I'm not his girlfriend. What should I do?
But you are already having a relationship – just a one-sided one, without any emotional involvement on his part.
The thing about friends with benefits is that, often, only one partner gets all the benefits while the other gets heartbroken. It's the nature of the deal – a friendship with benefits only serves to satisfy the physical needs without the emotional commitment. And because women are pretty much wired to form emotional attachments to men they are intimate with, casual relationships tend to be a bad bargain for the fairer sex.
That's why having friends with benefits can get so confusing: You are emotionally attached to him, believe that he must feel the same about you and so you expect him to demonstrate some level of affection, for example, by being attentive to your feelings and certainly by not being overly friendly with other women. But then you realize he won't even recognize a relationship.
The result: You're hurt and confused.
I know it's hard, but you have to put an end to this friends-with-benefits arrangement between you. Then, hopefully, he'll start paying more attention to you and take you seriously. But even if he doesn't, at least you'll get back your self-respect. You deserve better.
Copyright © ShoppingLifestyle.com
Follow us: 
